Extremely violent action sequences. Eardrum-tearing rock music. Facial-hammering 3D-effects and slow-motion scenes of a Scandinavian blonde Barbie doll waving her hair in your face.
That is essentially what the new Nicolas Cage movie Drive Angry is all about. It’s a motion picture that can’t be taken serious and comes across as such an empty, bombastic blockbuster that you hunger for a little more credibility and story-driven characters.
The story itself is so simple you can write all of it on a piece of toilet paper. Nicolas Cage’s daughter is kidnapped and will be sacrificed at full moon. He has to rescue her. Voila, that’s all there is to tell! Why an Oscar-winning actor like Nicolas Cage engages in such everyday clutter is a question many of his fans fail to answer.
Where are the days when this otherwise tasteful diagolist shows his true strengths in classics, such as Face/off and Snake eyes?
The irony of the it all is how Drive Angry isn’t all that bad. There have been far worse action movies, made in Hollywood. Action movies that put you to sleep. Action movies contain too much CGI. Or action movies that are so mundane that you’re wishing for the end to happen soon.
That’s not the case with this one. Okay, it ain’t a highly sophisticated motion picture – that’s right! – but it gives you enough positive energy in the department of entertainment, to fully enjoy it from beginning till end!
The best way to describe this movie is to compare is to a bag of chips or a quick meal at a fastfood-restaurant. You enjoy it, but the experience doesn’t stay with you for very long.
The turbulent action in the movie is ever-present and intensive, and it gives you as a viewer hardly any time to catch your breath. Every character is also amazingly one-dimensional, but thankfully there are a few creative spurs to keep the story spinning.
The 3D-effects (yep, you’ll need one of those thick glasses) are cheap compared to the wonders of Avatar, but a vast improvement over the 3D crappy-images of Clash of the titans.
For the actors, it’s all about acting against a Green Screen.
Nicolas Cage plays an insanely cool person who seems to dodge every single bullet as if he were Neo himself. He speaks with a lower voice to boost his courage as the hero of the story … of course! There is not much acting involved, as it with most of his movies. Every few moments he gives an angry look in the camera. That’s pretty much it …
Naturally, there is also the mandatory ‘superbabe’ who makes an impression. She has the perfectly round-shaped, delicate and tanned body, so sexy it can make a homosexual drool all over his new pink clothes until he suffocates in his own saliva.
Her name is Amber Heard and the actress has more straight-to-video time wasters on her oeuvre than all B-actors in Hollywood combined. But she is beautiful beyond count, let’s give her that, and she doesn’t look all that bad when having to fistfight her way out of a dangerous situation.
The only actor who can push the ground-level quality of this movie to a higher status is ex-Prison Breaker William Fichtner. His role is quite the mystery until the very end of the movie, and he possesses enough mysticism and flair to easily becomes the most interesting guy on the block.
Without him this movie would’ve crashed and burnt like a speeding race car after the first obstacle!
did you know?
The name of Nicolas Cage’s character is John Milton. This is likely a reference to Paradise Lost, an epic about Satan’s expulsion from Heaven and the creation of Hell, which was written by John Milton.
Give it to me straight:
Drive angry has so little to offer in terms of a story that a commercial on Norwegian wool socks might actually interest you more.
But there is one little light in the bleakness …
The movie is aware of its shortcomings which means it’s focused on one thing: to entertain the audience with an abundance of violence, hot babes, classy cars and pumping 3D ‘in your face’ action sequences.
This old combination works pretty well, though the movie is by far no Fast & the Furious! What is it then? It’s just an everyday run-down-the-mill of a big loud action movie.
Be careful – it’s possible that afterwards you may exit the cinema feeling tired, due to all the explosions and crashing cars in your face.
Thank God for actor William Fichtner. At least there is one guy running around who can ‘act’.